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Special Episode- Dear little Brother


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“Had I given you enough time and guided you properly, your result wouldn’t have been like this, Gon.”, I said to my brother regretfully when I saw the mark sheet of his Intermediate in Commerce, which was published that day. He had failed in two subjects, in Nepali and Economics. He was weak in Nepali since he was a child. And for Economics, he himself was surprised with the result.
“I am fine with the result brother. It was my fault that I didn’t pay much attention to my studies. Don’t feel guilty at all. You always have been a source of inspiration for me. Next time I will surely obtain good marks. It’s my promise to you.” He tried to convince me.
It should have been me to convince him for his failure, but it was him who was convincing.
Once I was in the same classroom as my brother, studying for one of our terminal examination. I was in grade IX then, while he was in the 4th standard. Fortunately, I was in the same class as my brother. Mam Amrita, his Nepali teacher came to our room as our invigilator. He had failed in Nepali in the previous terminal examination. So, she asked him how his preparation was. But in this terminal examination, I had taught him Nepali the day before for his examination. He said with a bright face that his brother, I had taught him very well and he knows everything. He was very happy mentioning my name, and I was happy to see him happy as well. “oh! That means your brother taught you better than me huh that you understood everything that he taught you and you never understood my teachings.”, she tried a little to negate me. But he said,” Yes, my brother is the best.”
Soon the bell rang and the exam began.
After a week, the result of the examination was declared. I always had been the topper of my class, so my result was good. My brother was also diligent in all subjects except Nepali. But this time, he got very good marks in Nepali. He was so happy with the result, and he kept on showing off his result to everyone and saying that his brother was the best.
I still remember that day. It was the first day I realized how much my brother idolizes me, how much he loves me, and how much he wanted to learn from me. Once I was talking to my friends, standing in our school’s playground. It was Tiffin time and my brother was also playing with his friends. One of his friends asked what his dream was. He said his dream was to become like his brother. What a line to be heard from your own brother! I guess that whole day I was feeling good just because of those words.
Such a lovely brother is of mine. I was and am very happy to have him as my brother. But unfortunately, I couldn’t spend more time with him after my intermediation. I had to go abroad for my higher studies, so I left my brother on his own. I could not teach him and guide him as he wished and he could not cherish the love I had wanted to give him.
Many times, he used to post on his Facebook profile that he misses me, many times he texted me and called me to find out when I would come back. He knew that his brother would come only once a year, but he used to ask again and again; maybe he would feel better by doing so. But me, who dares to say that I love him so much, never ever posted anything on social media about my brother, because I am an introvert. I don’t know how to express my love for others and I don’t know how to show him that I really love him, I do.
I was murmuring I guess; I felt like someone was calling me. Oh my god, it was just a dream and I had been fast-forwarded to the future. It was my mom asking me what happened. She asked if I saw a bad dream.
Yes, indeed it was a bad dream. Even after waking up, I felt nostalgic. I saw my brother having a sound sleep in the other bed. I went there to hug him. He started making some sound. Maybe I disturbed his sleep. I went back to sleep again.
I woke up again to find that my brother was calling me to wake me up.
“ Oh shit! I even missed my morning date with Liza. Whew, she is gonna scold me tomorrow. But I know how to make up with her. Hehe”
I became fresh. I had breakfast with my bro and got ready to go to school. I carried his bag to school and decided that I will give him the love he deserves, and will not feel guilty in the future. I even thought of teaching him NEPALI every evening. Next

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